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Archive for the ‘Malaysia’ Category

The Rage


Hopefully, it is a well-known fact to men everywhere that women, when tired and especially HUNGRY, turn into complete monsters.

I’m talking a total personality change. From sweetheart to ball-breaker (Mr. Mo’s favourite word). From placid to raging lunatic. Kind of like the Incredible Hulk.

In other words: just another normal day being a woman.

If your woman has not had anything to eat for 6 hours and has had little or no sleep for the last few days, you will have a monster on your hands – quick, get the little lady something to eat! Preferably with sugar! Then send her to bed with a nice foot/back/shoulder massage and plenty of kisses. Let her bitch and whine and moan – it’s not the real her that’s talking or saying those horrible things.

Think of it like the movie The Exorcist: it’s not really the little girl who was saying “Let Jesus f**ck you!” It was the devil.

I think this is where the phrase “The Devil made me do it” came from: a hungry, angry woman in the grip of a murderous rage.

I have spells of this monster from time to time whenever I am hungry, tired and my patience is depleted. I cannot bring myself to be civil and laugh at some of Mr. Mo’s more inane jokes. I am unable to filter my snide comments. I cannot do anything but feel the beast gnawing on my insides and driving me absolutely bananas. But usually, I am able to just quell the fury before it gets totally out of control. It might come off as me being a bit bitchy, when in fact deep down inside I want to gouge out the eyes of anyone who wants to waste my time and basically get in the way of me and my only goal: food / sleep.

I got a new job on Monday that is physically and emotionally rewarding, but equally draining on my energy and spirits: teaching.

I am the kind of person who needs at least 8 hours of sleep a night to function. So imagine what it was like when I was sleeping only 4 hours (if that!) a night for 4 days straight. Hey man, I’m missing 16 hours of sleep here!!

On top of that, because I am so busy, I don’t even take my 30 minute lunch break. Which means that after my hurried bowl of cereal at 7:00am, I basically do not eat anything else ’til class finishes at 1:15pm. Do the math. That is over 6 frickin’ hours. 

Naturally, I feel quite irritable by then, but I am extremely good at concealing it with big smiles and friendly greetings. Inside, I am seething. I’m not mad at anyone, no. But if you are the unlucky sonofabitch who happens to say the wrong thing in front of me at the wrong time… you don’t wanna know what I might do or say!!!

One day after work, I had to make a pit stop at the supermarket to pick up some essentials (eggs, milk, bread… ok, our pantry was empty alright!). I could not face another day of coming home to an empty fridge. It’s depressing. So I mustered up the last reserves of my will and energy and dragged my sorry butt to Woolworths.

Boy, are there a lot of morons at the supermarket!

First you have a bunch of annoying kids playing chasey and running rings around you.

Then, you have people who walk slowly and block the entire aisle, or people who are walking fast but stop or turn abruptly, almost crashing into you.

Usually if someone is blocking my way in an aisle, I just smile and say “sorry, excuse me” and so on, so they will move out of the way.

This time, I still said it, but without a smile and through gritted teeth. What I was really saying in my head was “FUCKING MOVE YOUR ASS YOU WHORE!!!!” I even gave some people the ol’ hip-and-shoulder when they wouldn’t move out of my way. Just kidding. But in my head I wanted to pull them out of the way by their hair, or something like that.

Do NOT get in my way when I am hungry or tired.

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!


This is just a wish to everyone who reads this blog to have an awesome 2012, with all the joy and fortune you dreamed of and deserve, and hopefully the world won’t end.

HAPPY 2012!!!’

xoxo

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Lonely.


I spent 11 days in Malaysia, visiting family and friends, constantly surrounded by loved ones and engaging in conversation, that to come home to an empty house here in Perth leaves an empty feeling in my soul.

I miss my boyfriend so much. He is away on holidays at the moment and won’t be back for a while. It’s just not the same without him. The dinners in front of the TV, the drives, the walks in the park, feeding the ducks (and having our stale bread scoffed at by the black swan)… I miss all these things.

I know I used to complain about how he can sometimes be ‘overly spontaneous’, like suggesting we go for a quick walk and it ending up an excursion, when I’ve got a pile of Uni work to finish and can’t afford long, meandering walks… but now, I miss it. I need a welcome distraction from the stress of my uni work which is threatening to bury me.

It doesn’t help that I haven’t heard from him since yesterday afternoon. I hope he’s okay. I mean, I know he is, but it’s still not nice missing them and not being able to hear their voice. He’s having phone problems (battery is dead or something), and he usually sends me an email a day but… so far, nothing.

I just miss him so much! It’s been 2 weeks since our mini-airport scene where I saw him properly tear up for the first time ever, as I got ready to board the plane to KL.

Just thinking about it gives me a lump in my throat.

 

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I have a question, folks…

How many of you look back at trysts from your past (and I don’t mean very long ago I’m talking as recently as the end of ’09, onwards) and feel.. wtf was I thinking? Who WAS I at that time to want to date THAT person? UGH!!

I was on Facebook and looking through my photos, friends list and friend’s friends, it made me think…

… why on earth did I give THAT guy the time of day?

I think it really depends on your frame of mind at the time… I can kind of trace how I was feeling and what was happening in my life just by looking at guys I’ve dated / gone on dates with. And I have to say, boy am I glad I’m where I’m at now!

Where I’m headed seems a more positive place, too. Only good things to look forward to in the future. Salut!

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Kid Stuff


Just posting an old, old photo of myself and my sister Natalie when we were kids… I was probably 6 years old in this photo, though I’m not 100% sure. I was eating Baskin Robbins ice-cream by the looks of it!

 

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Gossip Girls (and Boys)


You know, like everyone else, I do enjoy a juicy bit of gossip every now and then. Sure I do. I’m not a saint; I’m certainly not above having a chin-wag with the bestie over coffee.

But sometimes, the gossiping does get a little old. There’s only so much to talk about before it gets stale, repetitive, and plain uninteresting, anyway. I’ve noticed that as I get older, I find there is more to talk about than other people I don’t give a damn about.

But somehow, there are people who can’t stop talking about others / you.

I personally don’t care what people have to say about me, because:

a) I know who my true friends are, and those close to me know me well enough to know how I am, and they like me the way I am;

b) the people who have stuff to say about me that may not be true or in any way constructive, obviously do not know me that well and aren’t really my friends, and subsequently do not matter to me at all;

c) I know who I am, and I’m always true to myself, so… I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT WHAT PEOPLE SAY OR THINK.

Still, you do get people saying things like, “Oh, I heard some people said this and that about you,” and “People who consider you their friend said you’re like this and like that sometimes,” and etc. The person(s) saying this kinda stuff to me, invariably, is a person who hasn’t known me that long, or deeply, and hangs out with acquaintances of mine that she or he assumes are bosom buddies of mine who know me inside and out.

They aren’t, and they don’t. And furthermore, they’re just talking about me because they have nothing better to talk about. Honestly, and I’m not trying to be my own detractor here, but they don’t even KNOW me, what could they possibly have to talk about? Not much. And if that’s the case, WOW, you really don’t have much else to discuss with your friends, do you?

And why would you assume that I would care who said what, and that it really matters to me in my life, and the grander scheme of things? It doesn’t. I am happy doing what I’m doing, I finally feel I have my priorities straight, especially when it comes to spending my time with people.

I also really hate it when people get ’emo’ or make snide comments about me not contacting them when I’m in town. Like, “Oh, I had to hear it from my hairdresser that you’re back in town, why you never contact me?”

First of all, have we ever hung out, like EVER, outside of a group of mutual friends type of situation? No.

Are we even close friends, and do we ever call/text/Skype when I’m out of town? No.

Have I even seen you in the last 6 to 12 months? No.

So… err… what in tarnation?

My true friends never make such comments. You wouldn’t believe it, but sometimes I DO get so busy that I don’t end up being able to hang out or see my friends when I’m in town. Unfortunately. But they never hold it against me. They never ‘merajuk’ with me. They understand that I have a life and things are going on that, sometimes, are beyond my control. Family stuff gets in the way a lot (and I’m not saying it’s a bad thing per se). Chores, errands, timing is bad, etc.

Sometimes I just don’t have the time to return a call or reply to a text until the next day. And sometimes my friends are the same – I don’t get a reply ’til hours or a day or so later. It’s okay, it’s fine. I understand, you’re busy, and you’ll contact me when you’re free. And they get it, too.

So I guess what I mean to say with this post is, screw the naysayers, they don’t know you that well if they’re badmouthing you or making snide remarks. At the end of the day, we really don’t need to waste our time on them.

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The Bee’s Knees


This post is just a shoutout to my good friend Esther Rani! She’s having knee surgery (on both knees – eek!) today, right about now, actually…

Best of luck, sweetie! I’m sure everything will be fine and you’ll recover in no time 🙂

BIIIG hugs!!

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